| Attacking / Lunging
|
| Wicked child!
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| Don't look at me!
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| Hygiene!
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| Manners!
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| Spoiled brat!
|
I'm sorry!
You're welcomes!
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| Honk-a-doo! ( 2 ) ( 3 ) ( 4 ) ( 5 ) ( 6 )
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| Start Chase
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| Feets don't fail me now!
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| It's a wild goose chase!
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| Gets them, Phyllis! Gets them!
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| There they are, Daddy!
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| Now, boys and girls...
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| Children! I have something to teach you!
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| Come here, little darling!
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| Who's naughty?
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| Let's learn together. ( 2 )
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| Why, you're just filthy.
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| I smells rot! ( 2 )
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| Gets back here, you grimy little fucks!
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| Daddy. We have to save the children.
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| Run, you greased cow!
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| Charge! Andale! Mush, you saggy bitch! I wants blood. ( 2 )
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| Save the children.
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| You won't hurt my babies.
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| Come to mama. ( 2 )
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| During Chase
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| Come back! Mother has such a fun game for you!
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| Get back here, you silly goose!
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| Give 'em the goose grease! Give 'em the schmaltz!
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| Doctor Futterman's ready for you!
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| Don't run, children, I only want to play!
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| I WILL TEACH YOU ABOUT DENTAL HYGIENE! I WILL TEACH YOU ABOUT DENTAL HYGIENE!
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| We are going to get you clean! ( 2 )
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| We have to save the children! ( 2 )
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| Faster, Phyllis!
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| We're going to get them, Daddy, aren't we?
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| You couldn't just fucking floss!
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| Me and Daddy want to play.
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| If you let 'em get away, Phyllis, I swear....
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| Daddy want to drill!
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| Not so fast you chomo shits!
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| Slow down... Slow down... Mama just... ( 2 )
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| Daddy's gonna show you dental hygiene.
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| It's time to clean your orifice.
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| Grabbing or Executing the Reagent
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| Hold 'em down, Phyllis!
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| Mother has you.
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| You might feel a little pinch. ( 2 )
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| Mother's going to murder you.
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| Look what I got you, Daddy.
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| This is what daddy calls, the goose grease.
|
I swear to god, Phyllis!
Oh, daddy! Don't talk with your mouth full.
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| If you had only floss, you lazy child.
|
Is this good enough, daddy? Did the children learn?
Noo...
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Doctor F-U Double T-E-R-Man.
2
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| Why? You're nothing but cavities, aren't you?
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| You should've listened to your mommy dentist!
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| Let me at 'em, Phyllis! The goose is on the loose.
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| Daddy, you're chewing with your mouth open.
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| These children are so sweet. I think you might get cavities, Doctor Futterman.
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| There you go, child. It'll all be better in a moment.
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| A little more time brushing at the sink would mean a lot less time in the chair.
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| It's best to just let him finish.
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| Just hold still, this is for your own good.
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| Daddy, what are you doing?!
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| Give him the Goose Grease, Daddy!
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| Now don't you wish you had flossed?
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| Oh, Doctor Futterman. You are such a card.
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| Stunned
|
| Wicked!
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| You hurt mother! ( 2 )
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| Nasty little brat!
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| Hey! That's my job!
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| Heavens!
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| Don't take that, Phyllis!
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| Daddy. That man knocked me down!
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| They're laughing at you Phylis, is that what you want?
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| You awful brute!
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Children. Please...
I'm gonna drill yours ugly face to soups.
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| You almost fells on me, you stupid cow!
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| I'm sure they didn't mean it. They're good children.
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| On your feets, Schmaltzhefer!
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| Ooh, I'm afraid you've upset Doctor Futterman.
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| Now we're going to learn to respect our elders.
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| Come on, Doctor Futterman, let's teach them some manners.
|
Get up, you clumsy bitch.
You will not speak that way in front of the children, Doctor.
|
| Now children, was that nice?
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| Watch those grabby hands, mister!
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| Don't you push my daughter.
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| Such insolence!
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| Well, I never!
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| That's not how you hug Mother Gooseberry.
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| Why you pushy little somebody!
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| Blocked by Obstacles
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| I swear you naughty children.
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| You'll never get around that, you blithering cow.
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| You can't put off your dental hygiene forever.
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| Don't you worry! Mother has her ways.
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| The children are gonna laugh at you. God damnit, Phyllis!
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| You're not gonna lets that stops you. Not a big girl like you.
|
| Searching the Area
|
What are you doing, Phyllis?
There's nobody there, Dad.
God damnits.
|
I don't think anybody's there.
You scared thems off, you great clumsy slut.
|
That poor child.
You dumb cow.
|
| There's nothing heres.
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| I'm bored. Make Daddy a screwdriver and rub his feet.
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| I would have sworn there was somebody here.
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| Tip-toe to the Gooseberry Patch! Doo-doot doo-doot doo doo doo... ( 2 )
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| The goose is on the loose, the goose is on the loose, pulling teeth and cavities, the goose is on the loose.
|
| I'm sure there's some children somewhere who'd just love to meet Doctor Futterman.
|
| What's this now?
|
Do we have a new friend?
Could you waddle any slower. Jesus Christ.
There's no rush, Doctor Futterman.
Well you're not getting any younger, that's a fact.
|
Do you know a five-dollar word for having a look-see, Doctor Futterman?
Fuck yourself, Phyllis.
Why, its Investigate! We're Investigating, Doctor Futterman.
|
Do you ever notice, Daddy, how the, the kids who aren't quite...
The fucking idiots.
Yes, Daddy. How the f... slow children always hide in the same place. ( 2 )
|
| Over there. Phyllis. No. Where I'm pointing. There.
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| You won't find new friends being a wallflower, will you Daddy?
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| Find 'em and grind 'em. Daddy wants a snack. ( 2 )
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| Move your ass, Phyllis. I can smell 'em. Like rancid shmaltz.
|
| Doctor Daddy. Does that... look suspicious to you?
|
Look. Phyllis.
I don't see anything, Daddy.
Waddle over, let's have a look.
|
Where are we going?
Call it a woman's intuition.
|
| Doctor Daddy, where do you think a naughty lurker would lurk? Let's try over here. ( 2 )
|
| Hmmm. That doesn't look right at all.
|
| Do you think those friendly scientists have been moving things around again?
|
| Sometimes I feel like the three little bears, wondering who's been meddling with mother's things.
|
| Over there, Phyllis. Come on. Let's give 'em the schmaltz.
|
| Oh, children!
|
| Mother Gooseberry wants some sugar.
|
| There's my little goslings.
|
| Over there! Don't lets 'em get away you schmaltzhefer!
|
| Who wants to learn about obedience!?
|
| Somebody's due for a check up.
|
| Step into my o-office, it's time to clean your orifice!
|
I heard something, too, Daddy.
Well let's go say helloes.
|
| Some rascal's shaking the bushes in my Berry Patch!
|
| Who's there?
|
Doctor Futterman, does that sound like a naughty child to you?
Wells why don't we go finds out.
|
| Lost sight of the Reagent
|
| Holds me up! They're still around here's somewhere.
|
| Oh, don't they think they're clever, Daddy?
|
Where do you think they are, Daddy?
Get the grease out of your eyes, Phyllis, they ain't far.
|
| Hide and seek, is it? Okay. Mother can play that. ( 2 )
|
| Oh where did that little darling go?
|
Ooh, I loves a scavenger hunt.
Why would anybody be scared of poor old Mother?
I should have had sons.
|
| My little lambs have gone astray... ( 2 )
|
What are you doing? Phyllis! Daddy wants to dip his beak.
Soon, Daddy.
|
| Why, I never, you're acting like you're scared of me!
|
| Those poor little lambs, thinking they can hide from Mother...
|
| Phyllis, you lazy cow! They're still close.
|
| Oh, you awful children...
|
| Patrolling
|
I'm sorry I'm so hard on you.
Oh, Daddy. I mean, Doctor Futterman.
It's because our work is so important.
I know, Doctor Daddy.
I only want your teeth clean so I can see you smile.
|
It's the candy. Rotting holes in their teeth. Rotting their minds.
But children love candy.
And I loved gin and benzedrine and hows did that work out?
You were always a good dentist, Doctor Futterman.
|
| You could have been a nurses. Somebody's wifeses. But noooo, you had to gets on the teevee. You hads to be a big star.
|
What do you think, Doctor Futterman, if we told the children we needed help?
Those dumb little shits are eating out of my hands. Out of my beak. My bill. Tells'em whatevers you want.
All our little friends in teevee land. Helping us out.
Tells 'em their parents don't loves 'em cause they don't.
Oh, I know that, silly.
|
Oh, Doctor Futterman? Do I have something in my teeth?
You smell like a hobo's whore.
Daddy....Doctor Futterman. That's not what I asked.
Well Jesus Christ get clean enough I can stand to get close enough to you to see your teeth and I'll tell you that's repulsive, too.
|
Daddy. ( 2 )
Doctor Futterman, please.( 2 )
Daddy, do you ever feel like we're not home anymore? ( 2 )
What are you talking about? We're in the studio. We're in the magic of television. ( 2 )
That's what I mean. Like we're not there. It doesn't feel right. The children don't seem the same. ( 2 )
Have you forgotten to take your pills, darling?( 2 )
Everything's a little bit wrong. It's like we're living the same day over and over, and over... ( 2 )
|
| I try to make one new friend every day. ( 2 )
|
| If mama won't look after her babies, then who will?
|
| You can't hide from a goose in a gooseberry patch.
|
| Hiding from mother only makes things worse.
|
Are we playing hide-and-seek then?
We're gonna play hide the drill.
|
| Is somebody trying to hide from mother?
|
| If you're going to play with my babies, you're going to play with mother. ( 2 )
|
They're heres somewhere, Phyllis.
I'm looking, Daddy.
Well look harder. Daddy wants to get his beak wet.
|
| Finds me something rotten to drill, you lumbering slut.
|
| I insist on meeting all of my children's friends.
|
| Who could it be, hiding from mother?
|
| When I was little, the other children never looked for me. I won't be so cruel. I'll find every last one of you.
|
| Doctor Futterman! Daddy! What are you doing? Stop! Stop!
|
| Lateral incisor! Upper bicuspid! First Molar! Third Molar!
|
Nothing is as important as dental hygiene!
Nothing!
Nothing!
Not a fucking thing!
|
| You only have yourself to blame!
|
| You naughty, filthy little urchins!
|
| If you won't take care of your teeth then I will!
|
| Found hidden Reagent
|
| Open up!
|
| Say AAAAAAHHHH! ( 2 )
|
| Peak-a-Goose!
|
| Play with me's!
|
| Duck duck GOOSE!
|
| HONK HONK!
|
| (Growling)
|
| Spotted Incapacitated Reagent
|
| There's a good child. Daddy, would you like to operate?
|
| Mother's friend, Futterman, silly goose! Wiggled out the roost, now he's on, the... Loose!
|
| You just relax, dear.
|
| Get them! Nows! While they're down.
|
| Goose eggses to you!
|
| This will all be over in a moment.
|
| Alerted by noise
|
| I think I hear our friends.
|
| I hear a gosling, softly a-jostling!
|
| Children should be seen, not heard.
|
Over there, Phyllis!
Please, Daddy. Call me Mother Gooseberry in front of the children.
I shoulda calleds you "mistake," and thens I shoulda called the orphanage.
Daddy...
|
| Over there! I hears em! Move your ass, you great tub of schmaltz!
|
| Come out come out wherever you are!
|
| Yoo-hoo? Who's there? Are you looking for Mother Gooseberry?
|
| Does somebody want to play with me?
|
| Did you hears that, Phyllis? Even I heards that I don't even have fuckin' earses.
|
| I thinks I hears misbehavin'.
|
Dr. Futterman? Was that you?
Does it look like I have legses?
|
| Who's that tromping through my berry patch?
|
| Alerted on sight
|
| Mother Gooseberry's friends never stay hidden for long.
|
| Peek-a-boo, I see you!
|
| There's the little cankers!
|
| Doctor Futterman, I see them!
|
| Yoo-hoo! Children? Here comes Mother Gooseberry!
|
| There you are, you naughty children!
|
| Who's this? A guest!
|
| Now who's this in Mother Gooseberry's roost?
|
Who the fuck is that, Phylis?
Language in front of the children!
|
| Hello! Are you a new friend?
|
| I hope you're in the mood to learn!
|
| Who wants to learn about dental hygiene?!
|
| Prime Time - Leland Coyle
|
| I think one daddy is quite enough.
|
| Why would somebody call the police? There's nothing illegal about having a little fun.
|
The fucks is the cops doing here, Dorris? Last time somebody called the cops on us was a fucking disaster. ( 2 )
He won't get us, Daddy. I won't go back to the boring hospital. Never. Never, never... ( 2 )
|
| Daddy, that police officer was leering at me and... and stroking his night stick.
|
Would you stop fidgeting for godsake?
I'm just trying to fix my face, Daddy.
Since when did you care about... oh my god. This is about that fuckin' cop, isn't it, you great slatternly slut?
|
| I don't think I trust that police officer to play nicely with the children. ( 2 )
|
Who could have called the police on us?
Don't you worry, Phylis. Remember hows I took care of the last gaggle of cops tried to fuck up our good time?
|
I don't likes this, not one fuckin' bit. ( 2 )
Trying to tell us what the rules are. When all we want is a little fun.
|
| Daddy, that man keeps talking about discipline. He's going to ruin the game.
|
Phylis, make yourself scarce. I want to have a talk with that cop.
What? Daddy. Where would I go?
Christ, I don't know. ( 2 )
|
What do you think he wants?
I think he wants to schtupp my daughter and if he so much as looks at you I'm gonna drill his jaw out the back of his neck. ( 2 )
Oh, Doctor Daddy, you do care.
|
You think he ever sleeps?
Who? The police officer?
Yeah. If you ever see him sleeping, creep up and uh... get me close and then close your eyes.
Close my eyes? Daddy, why?
Don't you worry about what Daddy does on his own time.
|
| I'm gonna takes that fuckin' pig back to the academy. I gots a drill for that cop.
|
That awful man called me beef.
Did that mean old cop hurt your feelings? ( 2 )
He laughed at me.
Poor cow.
|
Mother makes the rules. That's how a household should be run. Not some... some...
Jack-booted government fuck job.
|
What do you think his eyes look like? Behind those glasses?
Oh my god, Phylis, dry your knickers out, there's children present. ( 2 )
|
| That is an impressive nightstick. ( 2 )
|
| That police officer really ought to watch his language in front of the children.
|
| Prime Time - Franco Barbi
|
| I've never heard such a foul-mouthed child.
|
Daddy, I think that man has a gun.
Yeah, I noticed. I got ears, don't I?
I... I don't know, Daddy. Do you?
|
| Is that little man collecting teeth? What ever for?
|
That sawed-off little eye-tal needs to watch his fucking language.
Oh, Daddy, even you've been known to slip up sometimes.
A little French is one thing but if he keeps making innuendos about my little girl, I'm gonna clean his mouth out with a drill.
|
Daddy, do you know what a... a "Lupara" is? The way he talks about it, it almost sounds like...
Careful, Phylis.
|
| Teeths is my job. What, does he think, he's a fairy?
|
Doctor Daddy, what are "Mammellas?"
Can'ts you say a single fucking thing without embarrassing me?
It's just that that little man said--
Phylis, shut the fuck up and then shut the fuck up.
|
| That runt's five pounds of schmalz in a ten pound bag.
|
| That little boy just won't play by Mama's rules.
|
| A gun? They're arming the gods damn loonies around here now? Somebody's gonna get hurt.
|
| I don't like the way that little man looks at me, not one bit.
|
| That pacifier's gonna fuck up his teeth. Any dentist will tell you that.
|
| That perverted little ingrate doesn't stop talking about your tits, I'm gonnna drill him another asshole.
|
| It is... nice to feel like a woman every once in a while.
|
That little shit needs a spanking.
Oh, I could help him with that.
Keep your pants on, Jesus.
|
Daddy, maybe I could... talk to the little dapper fellow by myself.
You're killing your poor father.
It does get lonely.
|
What a naughty little boy.
Maybe I could teach that dapper little boy one of my special games.
|
| You can think things and not say them out loud. You know that, right?
|
